i don't know what's wrong with me. something definately is. well, i guess i do know partly what's wrong with me: laziness, depression, unmotivation, pessimism, neediness, frustration, discontent... but what i don't know, is how to get over this. how to fix it. what the solution is. it seems like i've tried so many things (this b-log is one of them), but nothing has worked.

i keep on asking God but i sense nothing.

i long for peace, for joy, for restoration, for contentment, for rest, for freedom, for unconditional love/acceptance. the Lord promises these things, but where are they?

is it something i'm doing wrong? do i need to change something?
or is this God's doing?

sigh. what am i to do?


Hear my cry, O God;
listen to my prayer.
From the ends of the earth I call to you,
I call as my heart grows faint...
~psalm 61:1-2~